dan's journey

One of the lads on the CRED Women At Risk Ethiopia trip this summer was Dan. The trip was an incredibly transformative experience for him, and here is his story, as told by Leonie, his 'responsible adult' who accompanied him on the trip from a Portsmouth- based organisation called Motiv8, who ran the programme mentioned below.

This time last year Daniel Bailey was a 16 year old boy, involved in a programme that was all about giving back to the community; yet the only thing he was interested in was what he could get out of it, and how it would benefit himself.

He was a mouthy teenager, who would do anything to be popular and impress people; including getting involved in drugs and being a regular smoker of cannabis.  He described himself as a “self-centred bighead, with a lot of anger needing to get out”, and that was evident in his behaviour.  He was hanging around with other young people involved in drugs and anti-social behaviour and it was, to quote his Mum, “only a matter of time before he pushes it one step too far”.  It was all about what people thought of him, and if someone asked him to do something stupid or dangerous or even illegal, he wouldn’t need to think twice about doing it if it was going to get him a popularity status.

That was the difference with Dan, compared to other young people…he cared about what other people thought; meaning to me that he was simply an unconfident young man trying to figure out who he was.  Of course the other major difference, compared to some of the other young people I work with in the city, was that fact that Dan has a supportive family behind him, who literally just wanted the best for him, and were starting to run out of options.

As the programme went on over the summer of 2012, there was a natural reduction of those young people that were either removed from the programme or dropped out due to lack of commitment.  Despite Dan being involved in some of the more negative behaviour; rightly or wrongly I decided to give him another chance, for him to change his attitude and behaviour, making it perfectly clear that it was my neck on the line as well. 

As time went on, all staff on the programme started to see little glimpses of hope from Dan, with him really starting to step up to the mark.  (The risk of keeping him on the programme was starting to pay off).  He was changing from a selfish and angry teenager into a considerate and conscientious young man, and at that stage I saw that as an opportunity to challenge him that bit more.  Dan appeared to thrive on knowing that someone believed in him, and had taken a risk on him, and by the end of the programme had gone above and beyond all the expectations we had had.

It was at this point that I looked into a CRED Team Trip for myself and then decided to offer it out to a variety of young people I had been working with over the summer.  This was an opportunity that was made available with my support but unfortunately was not accepted by all.  Dan however did accept, and whether he saw it as a holiday, or a trip of a lifetime, I am not sure but all I knew was that he still had a lot of “growing” to do before he was going to be any use to any team in a different country.

Despite being an asset to the team whilst on the Portsmouth community programme; working hard raising money for local charities such as Enable Ability and Barnardo’s, he was still getting himself into some sticky situations back home with his friends, and still dipping into the odd bit of cannabis here and there. 

However after Dan got through his CRED interview I sat with him and explained that I truly believed he could be an amazing team member on the WAR trip to Addis but told him that I wouldn’t take him if he kept using cannabis and getting involved in anti-social behaviour.  This was also explained to his parents and of course they were fully supportive of my honest ultimatum.  Dan had a big decision to make and only he could do it…

8 Months later…

The CRED Team Trip to Ethiopia was a life changing experience for both of us.  For Dan he explained how the strongest memory he has from the trip was the team, and how “a bunch of individuals came together to form a truly amazing team and group of friends.  Despite varying personalities, we all worked together like we had known each other forever”.  Being part of a team trip does of course come with its ups and downs and Dan discussed how the most difficult part of the trip was the home visit.  Seeing the conditions that others live in really made him appreciate what he has and what he takes for granted.  This home visit was one of the first times Dan had to deal with his emotions, and whereas in the past he would have lashed or hit out, this time round he simply sat in silence (with his sunglasses on) until he felt ready to talk about it with me. 

Other aspects he found difficult was the Sunday morning tour up to the top of the mountain. “Seeing all the different people and what their city was like.  Children reaching for your hands whilst we were in the minivan…just like you see on tele”.  It was the first part of “real Ethiopia” we had seen and he admits “it was a bit of a shock”.

As for all of us who went on the “Friday Night Drive” this was also an area of difficulty for Dan. However instead of feeling upset helpless with the sights that we saw, he felt angry.  I saw a change from a teenage boy that used to talk quite crudely about women and prostitutes, into a guy that felt angry and ashamed to be of the same sex as the women’s pimps.  He didn’t necessarily show upset and sadness but instead anger and pure disgust.

The biggest impact for Dan has been the stories of the children we worked with.  We live in a sheltered world here in England, where all so often we don’t want to deal with our own problems let alone someone else’s.  However out in Ethiopia it was the stories and the faces of the young people that were our inspiration and motivation.  In Dan’s words “seeing what I could do, and the difference I could make, made me realise what I have to offer to others”.   He was an asset to the WAR team and away from his school responsibilities was a massive support for many, (including myself).

 My hope is that now he knows what good work he can do, he can go on and continue to make a difference not only to others’ lives but to his own life.  He has come so fair in just a year, and thanks to CRED taking the risk on me, and giving me the opportunity, I was able to take the risk on him.  And as it turns out…it was the best risk I ever took.